


jenga

by maplestreet



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: 2jin - Freeform, AU, Angst, F/F, Fluff, Pining, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-03-10
Packaged: 2019-11-14 21:15:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18060269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maplestreet/pseuds/maplestreet
Summary: Hyunjin and Heejin have been bestfriends since they were 6 year olds. Now they’re in college and she finds herself falling deeply in love with Heejin, but she doesn’t know what to do.





	jenga

**Author's Note:**

> _now playing: jenga by heize_

**_\--_ **

 

**_When the tower collapses_ **

 

**_I’m afraid of turning into ruins_ **

 

**_So how about I build a fence around it_ **

 

**_\--_ **

 

 

–

 

_The orange sunset dipped the school playground in orange as it turned silent after all the other kids have already been picked up by their parents. Only Heejin and Hyunjin remain, supervising the empire they made out of sand._

_“Hey, Heejin. We’ll be together forever, right?”_

_“Of course we will, dummy.”_

_“Yay! I love you, Heejin. You’re my bestest friend ever!”_

_“I love you too, Hyunjin.”_

_–_

 

Hyunjin messed up. _Again_. She thought she could get it right this time, but instead her technique ended up with the Jenga blocks sprawled all over the carpeted floor.

“I win again!” Heejin raised both arms in triumph, laughing at her best friend’s loss. “This means you’re getting me ice cream.”

Hyunjin crossed her arms and pouted. “This is so unfair. I never ask you for anything when I crush you in volleyball!”

All Heejin could do was scrunch her nose and stick her tongue out playfully.

The venue for this weekend’s usual hang out was Heejin’s house and Hyunjin couldn’t be more relieved. Her room was a total mess with college applications going on. Even though both of them were going through the same situation, Heejin’s room somehow stayed tidy and clean.

Jeon Heejin was _that_ girl. She was one of those popular kids in school who everybody knew, or if not, then heard about. She had good grades, joined extracurricular activities, actually cared about social issues, responsible, and all the good things anyone could possibly think of. Basically, she’s someone your parents would want you to marry.

But despite Heejin being _all that_ , Hyunjin, as her best friend, doesn’t feel overshadowed at all (besides, she was also popular in a different field). She supported her endeavors and loves her for it. Though maybe a bit too much for it to be platonic.

“How’s it going for college applications, by the way?” Hyunjin stood from her sitting position and stretched.

Heejin gathered the scattered blocks and began building them up again. “It’s going well. I’ll be taking the entrance exam next Sunday.”

Hyunjin blinked. “Sunday… don’t tell me it’s 3PM?”

“Yeah, why? Oh my god, did we have something planned for Sunday next week? I made sure we didn’t so I could take the exam. Oh god, wait–let me check my schedule real qui–”

“No Heekie, it’s not that.” Hyunjin laughed.

“Then… what is it?”

“I’m taking that test too.”

Heejin’s frown disappeared and was replaced with a smile so genuine it made Hyunjin’s heart melt.

–

Hyunjin stepped out of the principal’s office with a large white envelope in hand. Test results finally came out and all the graduating, anxiety-filled students were lining up outside, waiting for their turn to receive their acceptance (or rejection) letters. “How was it?” Heejin walked up to Hyunjin as soon as she spotted her.

Hyunjin looked down. Heejin didn’t want to think about it but the worst thoughts pooled her mind. She wanted to hug Hyunjin and tell her everything was okay, but–

“SIKE!” The taller girl shouted. “Did my acting convince you?”

“Oh my _god,_ you’re such a crackhead!” Heejin smacked Hyunjin’s shoulder. “I actually believed it!”

Hyunjin laughed and wrapped Heejin in her arms. “I made a promise, remember? We’ll be ‘together forever’ and all that cheesy stuff.”

Heejin rolled her eyes and buried her face on her best friend’s shoulder. “You’re so gross. I feel like you’ll be that one overly sweet girlfriend who makes people cringe.”

“ _If_ I’ll be someone’s girlfriend.” Hyunjin emphasized the ‘if’.

“Oh, please. I’m pretty sure you’ll find someone, Hyunjin.”

_But I already have._

–

The first semester of college finally started. And of course, the two best friends went to the same university and shared a dorm room together. Hyunjin took up a business course while Heejin took journalism. Both of them had completely different worlds now. New friends, new things to learn, but they stayed the same.

Or did they?

Hyunjin thought she was able to get rid of her foolish ‘crush’ on Heejin. But the world decided to give her an even harder time.

“So I met some people today.” Heejin said out of the blue. They were in the living room doing their respective assignments. “Jungeun and Jinsol. They seem pretty cute.”

Hyunjin’s stomach sank. “Decide, Heejin. You can’t date both.” She managed to tease.

“The–I don’t mean it _that_ way! I mean they seem cute as a _couple_.”

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding.” Hyunjin raised both her hands in surrender. “Besides, are you even into girls?”

There was a moment of silence, though not too awkward to make Hyunjin look up from the accounting homework she was working on for 3 hours straight.

“Actually…” Heejin said in a hushed voice. “Hyunjin, I think I am.”

Hyunjin dropped her pencil and turned to Heejin. Her mouth agape, eyebrows raised. She got up from her seat and hugged Heejin tightly. “I’m happy and proud of you. Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me.”

Heejin stifled a sob and hugged Hyunjin back.

“You’re so cringey.” Hyunjin felt Heejin smile against her shoulder with warm tears trailing down her cheeks. “But let me be cringey back just this once–I’m so lucky to have you in my life.”

Heejin’s remark made Hyunjin’s stomach flip. She knows she meant it platonically, but either way, she was happy Heejin thought of her that way. She’d rather have this with Heejin than not having anything at all.

But now knowing that they _could_ happen… Hyunjin didn’t know what to make of it.

Hyunjin and Heejin have been bestfriends ever since they were 6 year olds. Now they’re in college and she finds herself falling deeply in love with Heejin. She doesn’t know what to do.

Should she be selfish and risk everything or should she keep living like her love for Heejin hasn’t already been killing her inside?

So many thoughts raced across Hyunjin’s mind at all once she forgot she was still holding onto the shorter girl.

“I’m okay now. Thanks for that.” Heejin broke the hug and sniffled.

“Here, let me get you some tissue before you put snot all over your paperwork.” Hyunjin opened her desk drawer and grabbed a box of Kleenex.

“You’re the first person I came out to, by the way.”

“And I’m honored.” Hyunjin smiled.

Heejin smiled back at her. And although she looked like a complete mess with her hair all over the place and her eyes red and swollen, Hyunjin still thought she was the best thing ever. She was _that_ whipped for this girl. Hell, she would do anything for her.

Drive her to McDonald’s at 2AM just because she was hungry? Check. Pay for her meal at a Korean barbecue restaurant because she forgot her wallet? Check. Did her laundry because she had homework to do? Check.

In all honesty, it scared Hyunjin. The fact that she was able to do all of this with Heejin scared her because… what if she couldn’t anymore? The idea of losing Heejin was too much for her to bear. She couldn’t lose her. She _couldn’t_.

She had to end her feelings for Heejin before her feelings end her.

“Wanna play some Jenga to cheer you up?”

“You’re on.”

–

“Hey, I’m going out for some coffee. Do you want to come with?” Heejin peeked through Hyunjin’s bedroom door. “You’ve been studying the whole day. I thought maybe you needed a break.”

“I’m fine, no thanks.” Hyunjin replied, not taking her eyes off the material she was reading.

Heejin looked down and pursed her lips. She noticed Hyunjin was being distant towards her these past few weeks. She thought maybe it was because of finals coming up, but this wasn’t Hyunjin. Sure, they’d be super concentrated on their work when it needs to be done, but not so much to the point of actually avoiding each other.

“Hyunjin.”

“Yes?”

“Hyunjin.”

“What is it?”

“ _Look at me._ ”

Heejin’s voice was so deep and stern it surprised Hyunjin. She’s never been this serious ever since she got mad way back in high school.

Hyunjin finally looked away from her notes and looked at the girl standing in front of her straight in the eyes. Anger, confusion, and sadness filled them up. It broke Hyunjin to the core seeing it all happen before her.

“Why are you avoiding me?” Heejin furrowed her brows, voice cracking.

Hyunjin tried to think of a convincing alibi. “I’m not avoiding you. I’m just… I’ve been really busy lately.”

“Please, cut the bullshit.” Heejin’s voice was louder and angrier now. “Did I do something wrong?”

“No. You didn’t. I’m just stressed over finals, okay?” Hyunjin sighed. “Just go get your coffee or something.”

“Hyunjin, it’s been _a month_ since we had an actual conversation. _Weeks_ before finals season even started.” Tears fell from Heejin’s eyes and stained her shirt. “The fact that I don’t know what’s going on with you is driving me insane.”

The atmosphere grew heavy.

Hyunjin didn’t know what to say. She hurt Heejin. Badly.

“I’m sorry. I have a lot on my mind. I need to sort them out.”

“Please do. Because I miss my best friend and I want her back.” Heejin turned on her heels and slammed the door shut.

–

Hyunjin sat alone in the living room, working on the finishing touches of the latest project their professor handed out to them. After a few minutes of proofreading, she’s finally done.

_Okay, that’s off the list. Now, what should I do next?_

She checked her calendar for the tasks she needed to do, but there were none.

She had no excuse to keep herself busy anymore. It’s been 2 weeks since _that_ happened. She’s been putting it off for so long, she didn’t know how to go around it.

She told herself staying away from Heejin would help with getting rid of how she felt, but she was wrong. Every time she sees Heejin after avoiding her for 3 days, her heart sinks. Her heart sinks because she missed her, because she couldn’t reach out to her the same way she used to, because she knows she’ll never love her the same way she does.

_13 years._ They’ve been best friends for _13 years_. And for the past 3 years, she’s been in love with Heejin.

She knows telling her will most likely ruin whatever they have right now, but what _was_ it that they have at the moment?

None of them are talking to each other. They can’t look at each other. They can’t even stand being in the same room together.

All this time she was so afraid of losing Heejin, not realizing she already let her slip away.

Maybe it was time.

With trembling hands, she dialed Heejin’s number on her phone without a thought of what to say.

_“... Hello?”_

“Heejin.” Hyunjin said, at the verge of breaking down. “Where are you?”

_“Why do you suddenly care?”_

What Heejin said stinged her, but she knew it was well-deserved. She sucked in a sharp breath and exhaled slowly. “I was stupid. I’m sorry. I just want to talk to you.”

_“Well, you missed your chance.”_

Heejin dropped the call, leaving Hyunjin empty and speechless.

But she can’t give up now.

She scrolled through her contacts and bingo. Thank god she had Jungeun’s number saved.

_“What is it?”_

Jungeun sounded annoyed, probably because Heejin already told her what was going on between the both of them. Hyunjin was surprised she even picked up.

“Jungeun, do you know where Heejin is?” Hyunjin asked desperately. “Please, I need to talk to her. I did something stupid and–”

_“Woah, woah. Okay, I get it. You guys have drama. I don’t want to be a part of it and I don’t want to know about it. She just left our dorm with Sooyoung and Jiwoo. They’re probably gonna go grab a bite nearby.”_

“Thank you so much.” Hyunjin closed her eyes and smiled.

Jungeun and Hyunjin bid each other goodbye and dropped the call. Now that Hyunjin knows where Heejin was, there was only one thing left to do. She got up from the couch and put her hoodie on.

…

Jinsol and Jungeun’s dorm wasn’t that far off when you’re desperately trying to win your best friend/first love back. It was around 10 blocks away and the temperature outside was nearly reaching negative. But that wasn’t stopping Hyunjin.

_The things I do for love._ She thought.

After running for 6 blocks, she spotted Heejin bundled up in layers with Jiwoo and Sooyoung.

God _damn_ she was adorable. Hyunjin hated herself for hurting someone so precious. She felt so stupid.

Heejin waved goodbye at the two love birds and started to walk towards a different direction.

The pedestrian traffic light turned green and Hyunjin crossed just in time. When she got to the opposite side of the street, she was face to face with Heejin, Sooyoung and Jiwoo already out of sight. “Hyunjin, what the hell?”

“Yeah, hi.” Every breath Hyunjin took felt like she was inhaling shards of glass. Her throat was dry and she was panting heavily, her forehead dripping with cold sweat. “Can I please talk to you?”

“It’s literally 5 degrees right now and you’re just in a hoodie, are you insane?” Heejin took her scarf off and wrapped it around Hyunjin’s neck.

“I just want to talk to you.”

“Can it wait? I don’t want you to get sick. I’m calling a cab.”

Hyunjin smiled wholeheartedly for the first time in weeks. Heejin’s always been so caring to everyone. It didn’t matter if she didn’t know who that person was or what kind of beef happened between them, she was just naturally kind.

…

The car ride was horribly awkward. Hyunjin felt like a boulder was lifted off her shoulder when they got home.

“I’ll make us some cocoa, stay here.” Heejin took her jacket off and went to the kitchen.

Hyunjin finally realized how cold she actually felt now that her adrenaline was dying down. She lifted her feet off the floor and hugged her legs, hoping her body heat would cope. This is probably the second stupidest thing she’s ever done, the first is hurting Heejin who now just got out of the kitchen carrying two mugs of hot cocoa.

Hyunjin took the mug and wrapped her hands around it, delighting in its warmth. “Thanks.”

Heejin sat silently beside her but at a distance. Eyes still not meeting Hyunjin’s.

“I know you’re mad at me and it’s okay because I deserve it.” Hyunjin looked down at her cocoa and placed it on the coffee table.

Still nothing from Heejin.

“Heejin, we’ve been best friends since we were in pre-school. You were the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You still are.” She wanted to say it so bad, but the lump in Hyunjin’s throat made it difficult. “I didn’t want it to hurt when the time comes that I lose you.”

“Why would you even lose me?” Heejin knitted her brows, tears starting to form in her eyes. “All this time I thought I would lose _you_ , Hyunjin.”

Hyunjin was taken by surprise.

“Do you have any idea how much it hurt to see you purposely ignore me? Or when you dismiss even the simplest ‘good morning’ I greet you with? Or when you decline all my offers for us to hang out just like old times? At first I thought maybe you were stressed like you said, but a part of me also thought you were sick of me.”

“Heejin, I’m so sorry. It’s not like that, I swear.”

“ _Then what is it?_ ” Heejin raised her voice. “Because it’s been a shitty 3 months for me, Hyunjin. I try to not let it bother me but fuck, you matter so much for me to just neglect all this the way you neglected me.”

Hyunjin bit her lip. It was now or never.

“Promise me you won’t hate me after what I tell you.”

“God how could I even hate you, Hyunjin? You’re my _best friend_.”

“That’s what I’m worried about.” Hyunjin locked eyes with Heejin, both of them in tears. “I was scared. I was really, _really_ scared. Because I’ve been in love with you for 3 years, Heejin.”

Heejin was expressionless. She opened her mouth to say something, but no words came to her mind.

“I didn’t do it on purpose. I didn’t even know I started piling up my feelings for you and grew more attached. That’s why I was worried I’d fall even deeper when I realized–especially since we spent even more time with each other now. I thought avoiding you would get rid of how I felt for you, but I’ve never been so goddamn wrong.” Hyunjin laughed softly. “I didn’t want to lose our friendship and if ever it _did_ become… us… I didn’t want to lose you in that way, too. The thought of losing you scared me so much I forgot that you were right there in front of me.”

“Hyunjin…” Heejin uttered in a husky voice and moved closer towards the girl beside her. “I’m in love with you, too.”

Hyunjin couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Relief washed over her and a smile formed on her lips. She tried to hold back a sob, but she ended up bursting into tears.

Heejin held Hyunjin in her arms. They stayed like that for awhile until they found themselves laughing at their ugly sobbing. They kept enough distance for them to be face to face but still in each other’s arms.

Both were staring deeply into each other’s eyes until Heejin averted her gaze to Hyunjin’s lips.

They both closed their eyes slowly and bit by bit went closer until the space between their lips was nearly non-existent. Hyunjin opened her eyes slightly one last time and grinned as Heejin closed the gap between them.

Warmth took over Hyunjin’s body she felt like combusting right at this moment.

When their lips parted, Hyunjin’s already started missing Heejin’s kiss.

“Ugh, I tasted the cocoa we just had.”

Hyunjin rolled her eyes and kissed Heejin again, but this time more passionately.

The two broke off in giggles and ended up cuddling for the rest of the night.

“I really thought I would lose you when I told you the truth.” Hyunjin rested her head on Heejin’s shoulder.

“Dummy. I made you a promise remember? We’ll be together forever.”

–

_End._

**Author's Note:**

> twt: @lovecherrylipse  
> cc: @lovecherrylipse
> 
> send love and stan loona! ´･ᴗ･`


End file.
